Ummm. Yah. What??? Who is that girl? Can anyone see all the feelings she was carrying that added so much weight to her 5’ 2” frame?
While I realize that 90% of women would be thrilled to see 70 lbs and untold inches disappear virtually overnight from their body it has not happened in a healthy way for me. Originally I believed stress was the main culprit but after a visit with the doctor yesterday they want to go looking for more. It would appear that even stress “probably” can’t remove this much this fast. Ever seen a doctor look freaked out? I don’t recommend it as a life goal. And yes, he used the “c” word. They want to do tests to see if there is cancer in the small intestines or colon that they can’t see from the previous tests they have done.
My initial reaction was sheer terror. I mean, I think that’s normal, right?
God has been working in my life HARD for the last month. And honestly that’s about the only explanation I have for being able to go through that doctor’s visit, know that I have to wait a week for the test and who knows how long after that for results, and still be calm. Whatever it is I’ll get through it with God’s grace and the amazing friends and family I have close by. How could I not? If you look at my life and what I have survived and still found a way to thrive there isn’t another option. God gave me strength and resilience for a reason.
Lol. Do not take any of that to mean I don’t feel afraid. I am thinking about all I still want to do and see – I’ve been working on my bucket list the last few weeks – and I have no more time in my life to devote to illness. Between my childhood, Fred’s fight with illness, and my intermittent struggles I’ve given all of the time I want to give to doctors and hospitals.
Test is scheduled for Friday 3/12. With God’s grace we’ll have answers soon after that. So prayers please. 🙏🏻